Funny Sayings, Original One Liners by Jason Love

The last thing you want your relationship to become is serious.

Tennis is bad for your tennis shoes.

Philosophy is very meaningful until you have to pay the rent.

Family is anyone who can watch you take a dump.

Those of us raised on Twinkies know that there is no such thing as sweet fruit.

The nice thing about dining in England is that at the end of a meal, you’re always a few pounds lighter. But seriously.

“Heart” and “fart” are a perfect rhyme, yet you hardly ever see it in poetry.

Life is what happens when you’re not watching television.

Funny Cartoons and One Liners